Tag Archives: creation

Psychdelic Visions

“It’s very difficult to describe psychedelic effects to someone who’s never experienced them. But here’s an attempt:

(Above: VERY similar to how mushrooms look at higher doses. The whole room distorts.)

(Above: VERY similar to medium-dose LSD/AL-LAD. I’ve seen tree bark move just like this, with stronger neon colors.)

(Above: I haven’t experienced Breathing like this myself, but probably would at higher doses of LSD/AL-LAD.)

(Above: I haven’t experienced this one myself. But seems in-line with LSD/AL-LAD.)

(Above: VERY similar to recognition of Absolute Infinity on 5-MeO-DMT. The fabric of reality become infinitely recursive. This is how Nothingness/God feels to me.)

(Above: VERY similar to recognition of Absolute Infinity on 5-MeO-DMT. The fabric of reality become infinitely recursive. This is how Nothingness/God feels to me.)

(Above: Very similar to LSD, AL-LAD, Mushrooms, 2C-B at the peak. Although not this vivid at low/med doses. Maybe it would look this vivid on a really high dose.)

(Above: I haven’t experienced this effect myself, but read about it in trip reports.)

(Above: I haven’t experienced Tracers like this myself, but commonly reported on various popular psychedelics.)

(Above: VERY similar to the patterns I usually see on mushrooms, LSD, AL-LAD, and 2C-B.)


(Above: Similar to very strong LSD.)


(Above: VERY similar to how I’ve seen pine tree bark on AL-LAD.)


(Above: Haven’t experienced this effect myself, but people report it.)


(Above: This one resembles the faint geometric patterns I see on 5-MeO-DMT on the carpet, but in real-life the patterns aren’t so opaque, just a light overlay.)

Credit: PsychonautWiki.org”

Source: https://www.actualized.org/insights?p=44

The Scandal Of Modern Education

“It’s a scandal that mainstream notions of reality have still not factored in discoveries from quantum mechanics and general relativity from over 100 years ago! But an even greater scandal is that mainstream thinking hasn’t factored in discoveries from 2,000 years of epistemology. Epistemology isn’t even on the radar of the mainstream. It’s not even taught in schools! This is the great scandal: we get 12 years of mathematics training, and 12 years of history training, but 0 years of epistemology training. How different the world would be if kids were forced to do epistemology rather than math.”

Source: https://www.actualized.org/insights?p=49

Life Is A School

“Life is a school, a training ground. You’re here to raise the quality of your consciousness. The sad part it, most people don’t even know it. It takes many years of stumbling around in the dark just to learn that life is a school! Most people don’t recognize this consciously. They learn lessons randomly, not proactively. But once you recognize this consciously, you’re operating on a whole new level. Now you know that the aim of everything is growth. And now you take your growth into your own hands. It’s sort of like moving up from high school to university. In university you’re expected to take your learning into your own hands. Teachers don’t force you to do homework or study. You gotta be proactive and self-motivated.”

Source: https://www.actualized.org/insights?p=49

30/09/20: Am I Dead Yet?

Another day. Pain. I wish I had more to say except pain. Fibromyalgia. Allergic reaction to another food, feeling sick and lethargic. Haven’t gotten out of bed fully. Withdrawals off medication. What a mess. Wanting to get things done all the time, exhausting my brain. I don’t want this. Limited to under ten foods I can eat…

I am confused. So confused. Who am I?

Weak limbs, numb limbs, floppy limbs. I feel like I am dieing.

Another cigarette, another this and that. I am sick of them. I wish I had another option to cope with the pain and trauma left behind.

I feel like I am stuck on an acid trip. Be careful with what you take, especially at a young age…

Feeling misunderstood and bored.

Smelling the neck of yours, the musky, earthy and raw scent lifts my spirit. Making love to you in the morning and connecting deeply are some of the only things I have felt grateful and appreciative towards today. I wish I could do so much with you, but my physical space vehicle does not allow me. The pain and frustration in my eyes I hope communicates to you how sad I am I cannot do things with you that I should be at such a young age. I am in my twenties and yet a cripple.

Meditation, my mind spins and spins round and round, a chemical imbalance that won’t stop. The pain in my body makes it unbearable to sit still. Yoga, today every movement makes me want to scream. Chronic pain and an old lady at twenty, great. Never did I think my life would be this way.

My head and soul and body is a mess.

Part of me wants to obliterate myself, the other knows it is not the way.

Why am I here? What am I doing?

Days are going by, it is October tomorrow. It feels as if time is speeding up. I don’t know where I am going or what I am doing. The future I do not know. The past still haunts me, PTSD. The present is unbearable. I am trying. I am trying. I always feel as if I am not doing enough. I want to help people yet I cannot even help myself.

The misery continues under a smile, a smile to brighten others around me, a smile to try and lift myself. But I know I am not happy, I am screaming inside, I am ripping and shaking and numb and panicky and fearful. Anxious. What a mess.

I wish I could think clearly. I wish I had my life back again. I wish I could have my soul fully embodied, not split by trauma and the ignorant use of psychedelics and who knows what more.

Am I dead yet? I can’t wait for death.

Life asked death “why do people love you so much but not me?” And death replied “because you are a beautiful lie and I am a painful truth.”

A boy asked his mother, “why do all the good people die young?” And his mother replied “which flowers do you pick first in the garden?” Her son said “The pretty and precious ones.”

I hope I die in my sleep.

-DiosSoulRelics 30/09/20