Tag Archives: night

The Vastness Of The Heavens

If there were no night, we would not appreciate the day, nor could we see the stars and the vastness of the heavens. We must partake of the bitter with the sweet. There is a divine purpose in the adversities we encounter every day. They prepare, they purge, they purify, and thus they bless.” – James E. Faust

Cannabis Blackout

I stood outside looking at the stars in the countryside outside my bedroom a few nights ago. I smoked the herb and reality started to go pixelated. I don’t remember anything except intense fears, ego death and a BLACKOUT. Reality blacked out. I remember hearing a loud smack in the distance and it was my head against the glass of the conservatory window. All I remember is hearing my brother’s voice calling “Amber” “Amber” “Amber”. The voice got louder and I opened my eyes and saw my brother’s face. He had caught me in his arms. I was unable to walk, I had to lay on the concrete in the garden until I could go inside the house.

My brother said to me that he uses it for enjoyment, yet I was using it to run away from my own emotional, mental and phsyical pain and to sleep that night as I was withdrawing from sleeping pills. The lesson I got was that people use things for different reasons, your intention matters with substances that alter your state of consciousness.

The experience humbled me to a higher power. Ego Death. Scary.

Dark Night Of The Soul

“The Dark Night of the Soul is the experience of losing touch with your Soul – with the Divine essence that you fundamentally are.

It is a feeling of gnawing inner emptiness, melancholic depression, aching longing, and a feeling of being totally lost in life.

Those experiencing a Dark Night of the Soul undergo a disturbing existential crisis where life feels desolate, barren, confusing, dark, chaotic, and generally meaningless.

They may struggle with addictive tendencies, self-isolation, numbness, boredom, restlessness, grief, and an inexplicable thirst for something more.

If you can relate to these feelings, you might be undergoing a Dark Night of the Soul. And you’re not alone. So many of us are – and for most, it has been terribly amplified by the turmoil of 2020.” – LonerWolf Email Article

This Dark Night of the Soul | pamelahope